As you start this week, remember as you watch the other parents in your co-op or the carpool line who seem to have their act together that they, too, have their own little human insecurities. When your old oven misbehaves, or the butt in your jeans is just a little too tight, remember that new and shiny doesn’t equal happiness.

When you’re tempted to wish your house was on a quieter street, or a few bedrooms larger, or basked in more afternoon sunlight, remember that your home, no matter if it’s a farmhouse in the country or an efficiency in a crowded complex, is a gift. All things in our lives are gifts.

And remember that when your kids are using their outside voices in and then smearing their fingerprints on the doors, that these things are reminders that the ones you’re rearing are living, breathing, changing, soul-filled beings that will not remember the streak-free windows as much as the late-night storytimes and the shared conversations while you chop the salad for dinner.

And if life’s just not going how you want at all—the car has broken down again, your parents hurt your feelings, you got another negative pregnancy test—that it’s okay to cry. And be frustrated. And not understand.

But remember, too, that there is always, ALWAYS something to be grateful for. Take a scratch of paper and a pen, and scribble down one thing for which you’re grateful. And then two. And then maybe three. And display it somewhere obvious today. Be reminded.